A Whisper of A Story.

voltee ♦ November 28, 2010 ♦ 3 Comments

Item: Dress Color/Fabric: Silver/black, acetate Designer: Breakin’ Loose (yes, that really is the name, apostrophe and all!) Where Purchased: Uncertain- a gift Years owned: Also uncertain. More than a dozen, surely.
This week has been wonderful. I love the time around Thanksgiving, when the first layers of Holiday Spirit start floating around, along with the first few uncertain snowflakes. I mentioned before that I was feeling very reflective, and so I’ve spent a lot of time this week sorting through old pictures, missing friends in far away places, and searching for pieces to write about.
I did not find inspiration. My clothes are being a little shy this week; I look at them, but no one is screaming out their story for me.
I’ve been trying to figure out why I have such clear memories of when I wore certain pieces, and absolutely none of others. It’s strange. It doesn’t seem to have anything to do with how much I love the piece, or how exciting the event is. There are some pieces that I absolutely adore, and know that I have worn multiple times, but I can’t pinpoint a particular time. And there are events that thrilled my heart, that I could write about for days, but I just have no idea what I wore.
I don’t get it.
The only, very small, piece to the puzzle has been that on the days when I really struggle to find something to wear, when I am just dismissing outfit after outfit after outfit, and then I finally decide on something to wear, I will remember that outfit for years.
But sometimes I also have a perfect memory of wearing something that I literally just threw on in a second with not a thought of premeditation. It’s strange.
This dress is something that I believe deep in my heart that it has a story to tell, but it’s just too faint to hear. I think it might be because it’s too old.
I can’t remember exactly when I got this dress, or even where it was purchased, but I do know positively that this is the first article of clothing that Nate ever gave me.
I have a sneaking suspicion that I picked it out, though.
I remember being utterly captivated by this. I thought it was the pinnacle of elegance and sophistication. I loved the way that the overlay looks almost like lace, but almost like crochet also. I think I even had some sort of vision of this dress being so classic and beautiful that I passed it on to my children as an heirloom. Now I’m not so sure.
I’m sure I’ve worn this a few times, since I’ve had it close to 15 years. I have a fuzzy memory of wearing this to Nate’s grandpa’s wedding, very soon after the death of Nate’s grandma. So it was sort of a weird occasion, a little bit happy and a little bit sad, with a fair amount of family tension thrown in.
It never fails to make me smile, though, thinking about those days, when I still felt a little awkward in the presence of Nate’s family. I wanted so badly for them to like me! I remember Nate’s Aunt Laurie teasing me relentlessly, calling me “ornery.” I’m still not sure why, exactly…
And I remember that I wanted to be glamorous more than anything, and yet somehow I ended up with an enormous stain on this dress and had to wear a jacket for the whole reception.
Why do I have to get stains on everything? It’s frustrating. Well, at least I was able to get this one out.
But I can’t think of when else I might have worn this. I’m fairly sure that I could not have worn for the last 8 years, at least. I don’t know if I can see myself wearing this again, really. I’m a little worried about the neckline- I am broader now than I was in those days. And is it special enough to keep as some sort of heirloom or something? It was the first dress Nate bought me, after all. But he’s since bought me many more beautiful dresses. Is it worth saving if I don’t have any really vivid memories of wearing it?
I need some help on this one.

** I could use some help with this one. Still not sure what to do with it…